Whenever the world seems to
have lost all respect, and turning on the news gives me that feeling in the
first 30 seconds, I try to reflect on things I learned when I was very
young. Respect comes in many forms, and though
we’d all like to ‘fix’ the world every time we see political and social
principles denigrated, I always remember something I heard my mother say when I was
growing up. She was talking to my Uncle
Henry at the time. He was complaining
loudly about the state of the world (back in the 1970’s!) and that my parents
weren’t helping the situation by isolating themselves and tying themselves down
with six kids.
A little background here…my
parents had six children, of which I was the oldest. Suffice to say, they had their hands
full. My Dad worked overtime on a
constant basis to feed and clothe his family, and my Mom was a full-time
EVERYTHING, literally feeding, clothing, and passionately raising her six
children 24/7.
What my Mom said to my Uncle
that one Saturday night has stayed with me for life. She realized that she wasn’t going to fix the
world as a mother of six. She didn’t
have the additional time and energy that would require. By the way, she said that respectfully. But what she could do to help the world to
make sure that her children grew up feeling loved, cared for, and
respected. She likened it very much to
the speech that Robert Kennedy gave about ripples on the pond. Take care of those closest to you first, and
their energy will ripple out and touch others.
Hold the door,
say please, say thank you
Don't steal,
don't cheat, and don't lie
I know you
got mountains to climb but
Always stay
humble and kind*
I’ve always tried to make
sure those around me felt those lessons I learned as a child. Good work and kindness was always rewarded in
my childhood. The reward didn’t have to
be much more than a knowing and appreciative smile from my mother to know I’d
done the right thing. It has paid off
hundreds-fold in my work career and life in general. Recognizing goodness in others is a hallmark
of respect. As a supervisor and manager
in my early corporate days, I built a reputation for being fair, encouraging,
motivated, and kind. I don’t tell you
that to make myself look good. That came
naturally to me because of the great teachings and examples my parents
set. I always felt recognized when I did
something great, and it was obvious when I didn’t as well. It was only natural to me to share that
kindness and respect with those closest to me, be it a work-related person, or
a friend or family member. Fortunately
I always seemed to be in position to help others and that wasn’t coincidence,
that was learned.
When the
dreams you're dreamin' come to you
When the work
you put in is realized
Let yourself
feel the pride but
Always stay
humble and kind*
The events of May 22, 2017
in Manchester, England underscore what I’m trying to say. When tragedy struck that city at the hands of
a suicide bomber, residents from all over the city came to the site and lent a
hand wherever they could. Cab drivers and
passersby took people away from the carnage, and returned repeatedly to do so,
not knowing if the danger was over.
People locally opened their homes and sheltered those who were
traumatized and hurt. And the whole city
banded together the next day to pray for those killed and hurt in their
wonderful city. They didn’t resort to
hatred or screaming. They united instead
and reveled in their strength. No one
directed people to do the things they did to help that day. And no one affected by the terrorist bomb
expected the help by everyday people. Yet, there were heroes everywhere…helping
wherever they could.
Don't expect
a free ride from no one
Don't hold a
grudge or a chip and here's why
Bitterness
keeps you from flying
Always stay
humble and kind*
The arch of this blog should be fairly obvious for those
taking the time to read it. We all have
a hand in setting the examples of love, respect, kindness and humbleness for
ourselves, for our children, and for each other. There is no magic wand to fix all the hatred
in the world. It’s not something that
you can wish away or even pray away. But
if everyone takes just a minute to reflect on the things you were taught as a
child, the never-ending lessons of love and respect for each other that keeps
us together as families, you’ll find it easily extends to those immediately
around us, and then continues to ripple outward to those we don’t even
know. Always stay humble and kind!
* The song, ‘Humble & Kind’ was written by Lori McKenna. It was recorded first by singer Tim McGraw
and then also by Lori McKenna.